i start my sentencs with i because i am egocentric.

i am not going to junior high tonight.

i have to read jacob have i loved. and write a paper on it.
i have to read a bunch for film class. watch several hours of film. and write a few papers.
i have to read hurt. write a paper on that.
i have a some photoshop project to do.
i need to read a wrinkle in time and write a paper on that.
i have no homework for my aesthetics class.

i want to clean my room.
i want to wash my sheets.
i want to do laundry.
i want to make some valentines cards for people.

i have been listeing to the aquabats! and that puts me in a good mood.

i am going with cindy to do some homework at coffee depot.

30 hour famine.

tomorrow i will be partisipating with the jr highers and high schoolers at the grove in world vision's 30 hour famine.

the whole event is to raise awareness about the 30,000 children who die every day due to preventable causes. its also a great learning experience for the kids (and leaders) as we dont eat for 30 hours and in this time experience a little of what our brothers and sisters live with every day.

leading up to the famine we have been doing a 30 day challenge. we have been fasting from something different each day (tv, internet, a jacket, comfort, people...).

it has been sweet. i have been learning a lot about materialism.
it just seems like God really wants me to get this point: stuff does not matter. at all.
this concept that is so contrary to the american dream has just been all over the place- the passion conference, chapel, and conversations with friends.

i really want to live radically but i dont know how to do this. especially in a "christian bubble" at cbu where i am surrounded by "christians." i really struggle with this.
let me try to explain: so i know people who are really strong in their faith but then they are totally driven by money. like i know their relationship with god is real- but then why are they no different than the rest of america? and i see everyone around me living in the lap of luxury so isnt it alright for me to splurge on some awesome gadget? or another movie? or a five dollar drink at starbucks?

i have tried several times to simply cut stuff out of my life. but its hard. especially when i am surrounded by crazy amounts of advertising everywhere i go. and i always seem to find a way to rationalize spending my money on something stupid.

so basically im excited. i know i can only grow more from this weekend.

sleeping schedule.

i am really terrible at sleeping.
it is almost impossible for me to keep a routine when it comes to my sleeping.

lets recap.
wednesday i woke up at about 3:30pm
thursday morning i went to bed at 5am
thursdy afternoon i woke up around 1 pm
thursday night i fell asleep on the couch at 11:30pm
i woke up about 3am and move into the bedroom to try to fall asleep. now i find myself on the internet an hour later.

so to fall asleep i need 2 things: noise and a horizontal position.
the horizontal position can be almost anywhere: couch, bed, car seat that is reclined, the floor...
the noise is usually the tv or my ipod.

on my ipod i listen to podcasts. i listen to about 1 and 1/2 church sermons a night. the next night i re-listen to the one a fell asleep to the previous night.
podcasts i am subscribed to:

1. cal baptist chapel- we normally have good chapel speakers and i listen to all the services i miss. (listen to dr david platt series, and francis chan)
2. cornerstone simi- i love francis chan. this is his church. the grace series is good. but basically all the series are good.
   
3. the grove- sometimes i wake up early and go to the 9 service but for the times that i just go to the junior high service at 10:45 i will podcast the sermons. so i can stay connected to the church community. i also have all of travis's stuff saved. because i love that guy.
   
4. living truth:examining the mormon church- i subscribed to this podcast in preparation for my trip to utah last year.
   
5. mars hill bible church- rob bell. nuff said.
   
6. the porch church- a while back i downloaded all the old sermons from the porch (rip). i have been working my way through those teachings.
   
7. the rock church- a church in utah. tagline "for people interested in god, but not religion.
   
8. rock harbor- after reading "jesus of seburbia" i subscribed to mike erre's church.
   
9. sandals- they always have really interesting and relevant series. i go to the 7pm service about 40% percent of my sundays. and then i podcst the ones i miss.
   
10. the stirring- once dan announced his departure i subscribed to the stirring. i wanted to make sure he wasnt joining a cult. this church comunity checks out, they are pretty solid

so there you have it. that is how i fall asleep each night. right now i have 108 new podcasts.
but im always looking for new stuff to listen to.

so does anyone have anything i should add to my list?

school update.

so i know i said no more school realated posts after finals.
but i got my grades. a, b, c, c.
which is better that i did last semester.
but still not great.
i tend to do better in the classes im excited about and i am super excited about the classes i will be taking:

1. young adult lit- im thinking i will have to read sisterhood of the traveling pants, and gossip girl books. right?
2. current trends in youth ministry- christian studies class about summer camp and youth group.
3. film as art/film as culture- movie dates with my class twice a week.
4. graphic design- i dont remember the title of this course. but its with pardee again. so that will be fun.
5. photojournalism- i was going to take art and the bible. but that class was canceled. so last night i had the hardest time finding a class to replace it. but i am excited about this one.
6. aesthetics in the classroom- im hoping this education class will be about teaching art. but i could also be about making pretty bulletin boards.
   

in other news. i was planning on taking an online class at rcc. but there are zero classes left. i mean there are classes but none of them would benefit me. at all.

time to get ready for junior high.

a saturday fulla riverside pride.

if i was a gangster i would for sure be in one of the gangs that is all about riverside pride.
i would get 951 tattooed on my back.
i would have a fatty rain cross sticker on my car.

saturday morning i DARED TO CARE.
pretty sweet way to start out the day. i would estimate about 300 people from the grove and the path of life shelter were there. we divided ourselves into groups and set off to clean up downtown riverside.

my team was pretty hardcore. we were out in a a dust storm cleaning up train tracks. my legs were sore today when i woke up. im not used to using the "bending over and picking up trash muscles" they are very similar to the "rice planing muscles" i used in cambodia.
(im at the end of the row planting with the locals.)

after the clean up everyone ate lunch together.
hot dogs + chili + cheese + onions = gas.
:]


then saturday night emily, cynthina, stephen, and i went to the mission inn to look at the lights and have a crazy intense photo shoot.
kettle corn!
pretty lights.
spider pig, spider pig, does whatever a spider pig does.
more pretty lights.
mish.
giant orange!
how much longer will this behavior be accepted? i really love taking pictures with my friends. but i cant picture a mature 20 year old doing this kind of thing.

random awesome weekend. and its not over yet.

friday night about thirty college students gathered to celebrate two births at bj's brewhouse, a chicago style pizzeria.

i made a card. because im creative. no actually because im cheap, and i have alot of free time.
the front said, "what does a clam do for his birthday?"

i only knew about 5 of the thirty people. my friends eric and corrine. it was fun. and the food was delicious. and i enjoyed the night. some awkward moments, but thats expected.


and who can resist a pizookie?

saturday night started off with church. NICK VUJICIC is freaking amazing. for reals. i dont know how to explain it. i kinda want to see him again, he will be in california the next few weekends.


so after that awesomeness abby, holly, jillian, levi, and monica came over to my house. for an awesome dinner and some awesome games. we played an awesome game of spoons. this awesome game called Sentence To Draw(S). and the night ended with some awesome pumpkin cheesecake.